Chapter 11. Bumpitty Bump.--The Wopses

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_ CHAPTER ELEVEN. BUMPITTY BUMP.--THE WOPSES

For two or three days Fred remained very unwell, as might easily be supposed from the shock he had received; but the boys spent the greater part of the days with him reading or playing, and in the evenings came Mr and Mrs Inglis to sit in his bedroom, when Mr Inglis told them natural history anecdotes, or talked about the wondrous changes of insects in so interesting a manner, that the little auditory heard him with the most rapt attention.

On the second evening, in answer to a question, Fred related how it was he managed to be carried away by the stream. It appeared that it was through a sudden fright; for, while wading about with the water up to his armpits, he felt what he thought was a great fish touch him--but which was more probably a piece of wood--and he was so startled and alarmed with the idea that it might be a great pike, such as he had once seen in the river, and also caught by Mr Inglis, that he rushed away from the fancied peril, and, by mishap, this was done on the wrong side; so that directly afterwards he was splashing and paddling in the water, out of his depth, and with the stream bearing him away quite fast. He could remember the water bubbling and thundering in his ears as he was swept away; two or three great struggles to reach the side, and then it seemed like going to sleep, and waking to find himself in his bed, with three faces leaning over him, and everything else misty and bewildered.

On the morning of the fourth day, Fred was up again and out with his cousins before breakfast, getting their feet well soaked by the dewy grass out in the cedar-field as they took it in turns to have a ride upon the pony--one boy running by his side once up and down the field, and holding the pony by his halter. He was a capital quiet fellow, was old Dumpling, and put up with the tricks of his young masters as good-naturedly as possibly, and, on the whole, rather seeming to join in the fun, for he stood perfectly still by their side while they climbed up the fence, and from thence on to his back, and then went along at a jig-jog trot, just as they wished him. As for Harry and Philip, they were well used to being upon his back; but when it came to Fred's turn, he prepared to mount with considerable trepidation.

It might almost have been thought that, after the last unpleasant adventure, Fred would have been very diffident in joining in any of his cousins' rather boisterous amusements; but he had a most wholesome dread of being looked upon as a coward: the very idea of being despised by his cousins rendered him ready to dare anything; so that, no matter what they had pressed him to, he would most probably have attempted it, however strongly his reason or inclination might have prompted him otherwise; so, when it came to his turn, he followed the instructions of his cousins, and made a sort of half leap or vault upon the pony's back; but in so doing he overshot the mark, and went scrambling down, head first, on the other side. The pony, however, never moved, and as Fred was not hurt, he climbed the fence for another try, and this time came down just in the right place, but in doing so, stuck his heels so tightly into the nag's side, that, without waiting for the leader to take hold of the halter, away he started at a canter, greatly to Fred's dismay, for the bumping he received seemed something fearful to him, and he had no small difficulty in keeping his seat; but keep it he did, and the pony cantered away till nearly at the bottom of the field, when he subsided into a trot, the boys behind in full chase, laughing and cheering away as hard as they could. Trot--trot, went the pony, and Fred thought it was horrible, for it rucked his trousers up, and shook and bumped him ten times more than when he was cantering. But Fred was too much of a stoic to find fault, and sat it out famously, for Harry now caught up to him, and, seizing the halter, ran by his side till they reached the fence again, when Fred dismounted.

"Why, I thought you said that you couldn't ride!" said Philip, now coming up quite out of breath. "Why, you ride better than we do; don't he, Hal?"

"Ride! of course he can," said Harry, "better than I can; but a couple of old clothes-props, tied together, and put straddling over the pony, would ride better than--Oh! don't, Phil, it hurts," he continued, as Philip indulged his brother with a few thumps in the back to repay the compliment that he had given to the punisher.

"There goes the bell," said Fred, with a hunger-sharpened sense, running off full race towards the house, closely followed by his cousins, who could not, however, catch up to him until they reached the side-door, through which they all rushed together with such impetus, that they came in contact with Mary, who was carrying a plate of hot cake and some eggs into the breakfast parlour.

"Squawk," said Mary, as she was regularly upset, and they all went down--boys, plate, eggs, tray, and all--in one heap upon the passage floor.

Out came Mrs Inglis, and out came the Squire, and out ran the cook from the kitchen; and then everybody began to talk at once, so that the confusion grew worse than ever.

Master Harry was the first to get up, and, instead of trying to assist his companions in misfortune, or to rub the dust off his clothes, he began to collect the cake together; and, as the plate was broken, he very carefully arranged the three-cornered wedges on the top of his straw hat, as though the cake had been a puzzle.

As for Fred, he had quite a job to disentangle himself from Mary; for, when she was going down, she loosed her hold of the little tray she was carrying, and caught hold of Fred, and, of course, they went down together. But when Fred got up, he stood shaking his ear, and trying to get rid of the buzzing sound produced by Mary's piercing scream.

Philip was in the worst plight, for he went head first amongst the eggs, and was in consequence rather eggy. He was quite aware of his misfortune, and had been wiping the rich yolk off his face; but, not having a glass before him, he had made it rather smeary, and also left a goodly portion in the roots of his hair.

Poor Mary gathered herself up, sobbing half hysterically that it wasn't her fault. "No," said Harry, stoutly. "It wasn't Mary's fault. We all had a share in it."

As for Mr and Mrs Inglis, they took the sensible view of the case, that it was an accident, which only resulted in the breakage of a plate, and the loss of two or three eggs; for Harry declared that the cake was "All right," and they would eat it; go they returned to the breakfast-parlour, mutually glad that Mary was not bringing in the tea-urn, when the accident might have been of a very serious nature. But when the boys had made themselves respectable, and descended again to breakfast, all this involved some rather serious talk upon the part of Mr and Mrs Inglis, but did not seem to spoil the boys' breakfast the least bit in the world; while as to the cake, they said it wasn't a bit the worse, only rather gritty with a few little bits of china that had been left in from the broken plate.

"Well, boys," said Mr Inglis at last, "what have you been doing this morning?"

"Riding, Papa, in the field, and Fred, too. We had such capital fun, and old Dumpling seems to like it as well as any of us."

"Yes, I suppose so," said the Squire; "but I should think he liked it best when you left him in peace, and he had got rid of such a pack of wild young dogs, baiting and bothering him. Now," he continued, "what are we going to do to-day?"

"Let's go and catch another great pike," said Fred.

Mr Inglis laughed, and told him that they might go fifty times and not catch such another fish as the last; which I forgot to say in the proper place was baked by the cook, with what she called a pudding inside it, and eaten in triumph by the fishing-party, aided by Mrs Inglis, and declared to be the best fish that ever came out of the river.

"Let's go botanising, Papa," said Philip, "and go up the Camp Hill. It would be so nice, and then we should have to take our dinners with us, and Mamma would come too. Oh, do let's go there. You'll come, won't you, Mamma?"

But Mamma declined, for she had promised to go out for a drive with a near neighbour; but said that she should much enjoy, the trip upon another occasion. It was therefore decided that there should be a botanising trip on the next day but two, the following day being Saturday.

"Let's play cricket, Papa, and you come and bowl for us," said Harry.

"Bravo!" cried the others. "Oh do, Uncle oh do, Papa!"

But Uncle and Papa, though always ready to do anything to please his boys, seemed to think that bowling all day long, with the thermometer marking some few degrees above summer heat, was rather too arduous a task, so he declined, and said--

"Now, I think it comes to my turn to choose, and I'll tell you what I think; and that is, as several of the specimens in the butterfly cabinet are getting destroyed by the mites, we might take the nets and boxes, and have a very pleasant ramble by the side of Beechy Wood, and down the meadows, and then, if we happened to get so far, we could call and thank Mrs Benson again; and coming back to a late tea, we should find plenty of moths along by the wood-side."

"That's the best idea yet," said the boys; although it is most probable that they would have agreed to anything that Mr Inglis had proposed, and said it was the best idea that could have been thought of.

But this arrangement only provided for the afternoon: there was still the morning to be employed.

"If I were you, boys," said Mrs Inglis, "I should find something quiet to do indoors, and then you will not be tired before you start in the afternoon."

"Ah," said the Squire, "have a look at your lessons. You have not touched them all through the holidays."

"Oh-h-h--Ah-h-h--Er-r-r--Um-m-m," groaned the boys. "Oh, Pa; oh-h-h," they exclaimed, with such pitiful faces that any one might have thought that they had been required to quaff, each of them, a great goblet of salts and senna, or something equally nasty.

Mr and Mrs Inglis both laughed heartily, and the boys then saw that Papa was only joking, and the clouds disappeared from their faces _instanter_; and off they scampered into the garden to spend the morning quietly, so as not to be tired at the time appointed for starting.

"Come on, boys," said Harry, taking flying leaps over all the flower-beds in the parterre, as they went down the garden--greatly to the disgust of old Sam, who very reasonably said, "As flower-gardens warn't made to be jumped over;" and he then took off his old battered hat, and scratched his bald head viciously.

"Shouldn't I like to kick old Sam's hat!" said Philip; "he always will wear such an old scarecrow of a thing."

"I say, Sam," said Harry, grinning, "we are going to stop quietly in the garden all the morning and help you."

Sam grinned too, as he looked sideways at the mischievous laughing face beside him.

"Then I shall go," said Sam. "I won't stop; for I know you'll be plaguing my very life out."

"No, we won't, Sam, if you'll come and help us do our gardens up."

"Oh, ah!" said Sam, "and I've got no end of things as wants doing: there's all the wall fruit wants nailing in, and the grapes wants thinning, and-- There now, just look at that! Master Harry, you mustn't. If you don't put it down directly, I'll go and fetch out the Maester."

Sam might well exclaim, for Harry was beginning to help him, and had seized the scythe. With cut number one he had shaved off the top of a fine verbena. With cut number two, he had driven the point of the sharp tool into the sod. Where the third cut would have gone, I can't say; for Sam, hobbling up to the young workman, the young workman frisked off, and seized the barrow half full of grass.

"Jump in, Fred!" he exclaimed; and of course Fred soon made himself a seat on the soft green contents, and then away went the barrow as fast as Harry could run, and of course right away from the place where Sam would require it next.

Poor old Sam! He loved his master's boys, and he loved to scold them too, as much as they loved to torment him; and in all their skirmishes-- one of which always occurred whenever they came into his garden, as he called it--Sam always got the worst of it, and had to yield to numbers. And so in this case he saw that he should lose the day, and therefore he declared a truce, and called up Philip to act as mediator.

"Now, Master Phil, if you'll promise not to bother me any more, I'll put you all up to something."

"What is it?" said Philip.

"Ah, you fetch them tother ones here, and I'll show you."

Away darted Philip, and soon returned with Harry, the barrow, and Fred.

Old Sam made sure of the barrow by sitting down upon the edge, and would have been canted over by Harry, only he expected, and very naturally, that it would make the poor old man cross.

"Now, Sam, what is it?" said Harry. "Come, look sharp."

"Ah," said Sam, "I've a good mind not to tell you. You don't deserve it, you know."

"Oh, I don't care," said Harry, seizing the old man's broom, and darting off with it. "Come along, Phil, Fred, and we'll have such a game."

"Now, Master Harry," said Sam, appealingly. Then to himself, "I never did see sich a young dog in my life. Do come, please," he continued aloud.

"Well, what is it?" said Harry, advancing with the broom, held like a gun with fixed bayonet brought to the charge, and poking with the birch part at the old gardener.

"Well, you know, you promised to be quiet, you know, didn't you?"

"Why, of course we did," said Harry and Philip together. "Now, come, tell us what it is."

"Well," said Sam at last, "it's a wopses' nest as wants taking."

"Capital!" said Harry, throwing down the broom; "where is it?"

Old Sam's eyes twinkled with triumph as he got slowly up and led the way to his tool-shed, where he reached down the large fumigating bellows, and in the hollow made for the purpose he put in some hot cinders, which Harry fetched in a shovel from the kitchen, and then on them a lump of brimstone, and closed the nozzle over all; but not so quickly but that a puff or two of the penetrating fumes escaped, and made the boys' eyes water, and old Sam cough and choke most terribly for a minute or two.

"Now then," said Sam, wheezing away at a dreadful rate, "I'm not going with you, you know, so you take the bellows, Master Harry; and I should take some boughs, if I were you, and beat the wopses off if they gets loose. The nest is in the plantation, in the dead willow-tree that lies by the path; so now go on, and good luck to you."

The lads wanted no further incentive, but started off at full speed, to come back again directly to say that the brimstone wasn't burning. However, on giving two or three puffs with the bellows, Sam found this was not the case, for it was alight; so off they started, half wild with excitement, across the lawn, and old Sam rubbing his hands down the sides of his trousers to give vent to his intense feeling of satisfaction to think how well his device had succeeded; and then the old man returned to his work, chuckling away, and, I am sorry to add, muttering that he hoped they'd "some on 'em get stung;" an uncharitable wish, however, that had no fulfilment in the sequel.

"Come along, boys," said Harry, who was bellows-bearer; and away they scudded till they reached the wooden bridge over the ditch, and then they stood together beneath the trees.

Puff, puff. Yes, the brimstone was all right, and now for the wasps.

"Let me do it," said Philip, catching at the bellows.

"No, no; I'll do it," said Harry, putting them behind his back.

"Now, Harry, you know I'm older than you, and you carried them here, so you ought to give way," said Philip.

"Why," said Harry, "we ought neither of us to do it, because Cousin Fred's here, and he's a visitor. Here, Fred," he said, holding out the bellows, "you do it."

"Do what?" said Fred, staring. "I don't know what you are going to do."

"Why, take the wasps' nest in that old touchwood tree. You're only got to put the nose of the bellows into the hole where they are going in and out, and blew, and then keep them tight there till all the wasps are dead."

Fred looked at the bellows, then at his cousins, then at the hole in the fallen trunk where the wasps were flying about; and after giving a puff with the bellows, when smoke issued from the nozzle, he slowly approached the hole, and stooped over it to insert the death-dealing instrument.

"Buzz--booz--whooz--ooz--ooz--ooz," said a couple of wasps, coming home in a hurry, and circling round Fred's head so very closely that the boy shut his eyes, and, stooping down very low, backed away crab fashion as fast as ever he could.

"I shan't do it," said Fred, rather red in the face; "they'll sting."

"No, they won't," said Harry; "I'll go," and catching up the bellows, he walked boldly up towards the hole.

"I say," he said, "you two get boughs, and if the wasps do come out you can beat them down."

There was a minute of intense interest, during which Harry crept close up to the hole, and Philip and Fred, armed with lime-tree boughs, stood as body guard to protect the assaulting party.

Nearer and nearer went Harry, and then pushed the nozzle right in up to the part holding the brimstone, and puffed away as hard as he could.

"Whir--whooz--whooz--booz--wooz--buzz--wooz--burr--urr-r-r-r-- whir-r-r-r," said the wasps, scuffling out past the nozzle by the dozen; and one, which must have been the leader, made a lodgment in Harry's hair.

Down went the bellows, and away went the boys as hard as ever they could run out of the plantation, and over the wooden bridge, till they were safe from the infuriated wasps, whose loud hum they could hear even after they were some distance off.

"Here," said Harry, "knock this beggar out of my head; make haste, or he'll sting me." For there, buzzing and struggling in the boy's curls, was one of the wasps, which was killed by Fred, who squeezed it between two pieces of stick, and placed it beyond the power of doing mischief.

"Ha, ha, ha!" said Philip, when there was no more danger: and when he had got his breath again, "What a game!"

"Booh," said Harry; "was it? You wouldn't like to go and try again."

"I wouldn't mind," said Philip; "I shouldn't run faster than you did."

"Ah! never mind," said Harry; "you run fast enough this time. I only wish," he continued sulkily, "that I had let you go."

Now, Philip was generally most terribly teased by his brother, and therefore it was not surprising that he, who was generally such a mild and inoffensive lad, should take this opportunity of making a little retaliation. But one thing was very certain, and that was, that he would have backed out of the task even if Harry had given it up to him.

"Can't we fetch the bellows?" said Harry. "Let's go and see."

Off they went again, but at a slower pace this time, in case there should be any of the fierce little insects waiting for them. But their caution was needless, for the wasps were busy at work trying to stick their stings into the bellows, and some of them losing their lives through the vapour that came reeking out of the opening. But when the lads got near enough to see what a cloud there was buzzing about, they gave up all idea of getting the bellows till night, and took vengeance for their defeat by getting a little farther off and pelting the tree, but only hitting it about once in twenty times, so that they very soon tired of that pastime, and went back to see what poor old Sam could find for them fresh.

"Now, then," said Sam, when they came up, "where's the wopses' nest? The Squire wants some grabs for fishing."

"Ain't got it," said Harry, shortly.

"How's that?" said the old man; "you weren't afeard, was you?"

"No," said Harry, stoutly; "I wasn't afraid, only they came buzzing out so we were obliged to give in."

Chuckle, chuckle, went the old man at their defeat; but he would not go himself to fetch the bellows, although he laughed at the boys' expense.

"You'd better leave off laughing," said Philip, taking Harry's part, "or we'll stop here all the morning."

Sam grew serious in a moment, for the boy couldn't have uttered a more dire threat against his peace of mind.

"Ah! I ain't laughing, Master Phil, only it is good fun to see the wopses make any one run. If I was you, I should go and have a look at Bramble Dyke; they say as the water's nearly all dried up, and you can get fish out of it."

"It's too far," said Philip, "because we are going out with Papa directly after dinner."

Sam was done for a moment; but a bright thought flashed across his brain. "Ah," said he, "if I was a young gentleman, I should go down the north planting hedge, close to the dung-heaps; they do say there is a sight of snakes there; but in course you young gentlemen won't go, for as you're afraid of wopses, in course you won't like to go where there's snakes."

"Who's afraid?" said Harry; "I'm not; come on, boys," and away they scampered again on their new expedition; while Sam leaned upon his broom with which he was brushing the velvet green lawn, and chuckled again at the success of his _ruse_.

The boys armed themselves with stout sticks, and let Dick loose to take with them; and then away down by the big fence to the north planting Dick industriously hunting along the hedges and ditches as they went.

"Keep back, Dick!" said Harry, when they reached the manure heaps; "keep back, sir; quiet; down, dog, down!"

But Dick was not a well-trained dog at all. He did not often come out, and when he did he seemed to make the most of it; so every command given by his master Dick answered by a leap, a scamper, and a bark, and doing everything but what he was told.

"Catch hold of him, Phil; he'll frighten all the snakes away before we see them."

But Dick would not be caught hold of, but capered about just out of reach, and lolled his tongue out as though in derision of the efforts made to secure him, till, growing more bold and impudent, he kept making charges at his young masters' legs, until by one quick snatch Philip caught the rascal by one of his ears, and so secured him in a most ignoble manner, dragging him along with his skin all drawn on one side, his eyes out of place, and his mouth wearing a most serio-comical expression.

Poor Dick! he did not mean any harm; but as to being a trained and obedient dog, he was, as I said before, nothing of the kind, and often spoiled a great deal of sport by his wild harum-scarum ways. But now, as he was secured, a handkerchief was tied tightly round his neck, and another to that by way of a chain or slip, and then the search was prosecuted.

The manure heaps were very long and large, and lay on a piece of waste ground beside the park palings, and it was through the rents and gaps in these pales that the snakes came out of the plantation to lay their eggs in the warm manure; and, of course, if Master Dick had been left alone, he would have run barking and scratching all along and alarmed the game. As it was, they went the whole length of the first heap without hearing so much as a rustle. The second heap was nearly passed in the same way, when Harry, who was first, stepped nimbly back and caught hold of the handkerchief that held Dick, who, seeing that something exciting was going on, immediately became rampant, but was soon guided to a spot where a snake had nearly buried itself in the rotten straw, and lay with about nine inches of its tail exposed, after the fashion of an ostrich, which supposes that if its head is hidden it must be all right and safe. But there was no safety for the poor snake, for Dick was down upon him in a moment and hanging on to its tail, in spite of the struggles of the poor thing to get away.

All Dick's efforts were directed towards dragging the snake out of its hole, while the snake, by means of its scaly and plated body, offered a most powerful resistance, and tried hard to creep farther in; and so they went on for some time, the snake, however, gradually losing ground, until the lads began to dig round it with their sticks, and loosen the manure, when out it came all at once, writhing and twining, and trying to fasten upon Dick's head; but the dog's shaggy, wiry hair protected him, and shaking the unco' brute off for a moment, he got another gripe at it close up to the head, and shook it, and worried it, until the poor snake hardly moved, but gave in, conquered and dying.

The trophy was secured, and Dick's stumpy tail wag-waggled, as much as to say, "Didn't I do that well?" and then he kept snapping and leaping up at the handkerchief which held the snake, while his red tongue quivered and stuck out between his sharp shiny teeth that were longing to have another snap at something. The huntsmen then cautiously went along the side of the two remaining heaps, but not another trace of a snake could they find, so they went back the whole length of the four heaps, but with no better success, till Dick, who was down at the bottom of the bramble-covered ditch, suddenly set up a sharp, short bark, then there was a rustle and skurry for a moment, and he rushed open-mouthed up the bank head fust at the oak palings, and came against them with a thud just after a snake's tail was seen to disappear through a hole at the bottom, where a small piece had rotted away.

Dick whined and howled with rage at being thus stopped in his career, and seizing a piece of the broken pale in his teeth, dragged it so that he would shortly have made himself a way through, but his young masters were soon by his side.

"Throw him over, Harry," said Philip, excitedly, and in a moment Harry had the struggling dog in his arms, raising him till he got his feet on the top of the palings, when he leaped lightly down on the other side, and began hunting about through the fallen leaves and twigs for the escaped quarry; but all in vain, as his whining testified, so that poor Dick was called off, and had to run nearly a quarter of a mile before he could find a place to creep through, which he did at last by scraping a little of the earth from beneath the pales, and then grovelling through, getting stuck about the middle of his back, though, and whining till he got free, which he did after two or three struggles, and then ran to join his young masters, who were whistling and calling him as loudly as they could, and who now turned their steps homeward, for Harry declared he could smell the roast beef they were going to have for dinner. _

Read next: Chapter 12. A Flight With The Flies

Read previous: Chapter 10. A Sad Affair

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