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The Inside of the Cup, a novel by Winston Churchill |
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Volume 3 - Chapter 12. The Woman Of The Song |
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_ VOLUME III CHAPTER XII. THE WOMAN OF THE SONG On leaving Mr. Bentley, Hodder went slowly down Dalton Street, wondering that mere contact with another human being should have given him the resolution to turn his face once again toward the house whither he was bound. And this man had given him something more. It might hardly have been called faith; a new courage to fare forth across the Unknown--that was it; hope, faint but revived. Presently he stopped on the sidewalk, looked around him, and read a sign in glaring, electric letters, Hotel Albert. Despite the heat, the place was ablaze with lights. Men and women were passing, pausing--going in. A motor, with a liveried chauffeur whom he remembered having seen before, was standing in front of the Rathskeller. The nightly carousal was beginning. Hodder retraced his steps, crossed the street diagonally, came to the dilapidated gate he remembered so well, and looked up through the dusk at the house. If death had entered it, there was no sign: death must be a frequent visitor hereabouts. On the doorsteps he saw figures outlined, slatternly women and men in shirt-sleeves who rose in silence to make way for him, staring at him curiously. He plunged into the hot darkness of the hall, groped his way up the stairs and through the passage, and hesitated. A single gas jet burned low in the stagnant air, and after a moment he made out, by its dim light, a woman on her knees beside the couch, mechanically moving the tattered palm-leaf over the motionless little figure. The child was still alive. He drew a deep breath, and entered; at the sound of his step Mrs. Garvin suddenly started up. "Richard!" she cried, and then stood staring at the rector. "Have you seen my husband, sir? He went away soon after you left." Hodder, taken by surprise, replied that he had not. Her tone, her gesture of anxiety he found vaguely disquieting. "The doctor has been here?" he asked. "Yes," she answered absently. "I don't know where he can be--Richard. He didn't even wait to see the doctor. And he thinks so much of Dicky, sir, he sits here of an evening--" Hodder sat down beside her, and taking the palm-leaf from her hand, began himself to fan the child. Something of her misgiving had communicated itself to him. "Don't worry," he said. "Remember that you have been through a great deal, and it is natural that you should be overwrought. Your husband feels strongly. I don't blame him. And the sight of me this afternoon upset him. He has gone out to walk." "Richard is proud," she answered simply. "He used to say he'd rather die than take charity--and now he's come to it. And it's--that man, sir, who's got on his brain, and changed him. He wasn't always like this, but now he can't seem to think of anything else. He wakes up in the night .... And he used to have such a sweet nature--you wouldn't have known him... and came home so happy in the evenings in Alder Street, often with a little fruit, or something he'd bought for us, and romp with Dicky in the yard, and I'd stand and laugh at them. Even after we'd lost our money, when he was sick that time, he didn't feel this way. It grew on him when he couldn't get work, and then he began to cut things out of the papers about Mr. Parr. And I have sometimes thought that that's kept him from getting work. He talks about it, and people don't know what to make of him. They don't know how hard he'd try if they'd give him something.".... "We shall find something," said the rector, striving to throw into his voice confidence and calm. He did not dare to look at her, but continued to move the fan. The child stirred a little. Mrs. Garvin put out her hand. "Yes, the doctor was here. He was very kind. Oh, sir," she exclaimed, "I hope you won't think us ungrateful--and that Mr. Bentley won't. Dr. Jarvis has hopes, sir,--he says--I forget the name he called it, what Dicky has. It's something uncommon. He says it was--brought on by the heat, and want of food--good food. And he's coming himself in the morning to take him out to that hospital beyond the park--in an automobile, sir. I was just thinking what a pity it is Dicky wouldn't realize it. He's always wanted to ride in one." Suddenly her tears flowed, unheeded, and she clung to the little hand convulsively. "I don't know what I shall do without him, Sir, I don't.... I've always had him... and when he's sick, among strangers."... The rector rose to the occasion. "Now, Mrs. Garvin," he said firmly, "you must remember that there is only one way to save the boy's life. It will be easy to get you a room near the hospital, where you can see him constantly." "I know--I know, sir. But I couldn't leave his father, I couldn't leave Richard." She looked around distractedly. "Where is he?" "He will come back presently," said the rector. "If not, I will look for him." She did not reply, but continued to weep in silence. Suddenly, above the confused noises of the night, the loud notes of a piano broke, and the woman whose voice he had heard in the afternoon began once more with appalling vigour to sing. The child moaned. Mrs. Garvin started up hysterically. "I can't stand it--I can't stand her singing that now," she sobbed. Thirty feet away, across the yard, Hodder saw the gleaming window from which the music came. He got to his feet. Another verse began, with more of the brazen emphasis of the concert-hall singer than ever. He glanced at the woman beside him, irresolutely. "I'll speak to her," he said. Mrs. Garvin did not appear to hear him, but flung herself down beside the lounge. As he seized his hat and left the room he had the idea of telephoning for a nurse, when he almost ran into some one in the upper hall, and recognized the stout German woman, Mrs. Breitmann. "Mrs. Garvin"--he said, "she ought not to be left--" "I am just now going," said Mrs. Breitmann. "I stay with her until her husband come." Such was the confidence with which, for some reason, she inspired him, that he left with an easier mind. It was not until the rector had arrived at the vestibule of the apartment house next door that something--of the difficulty and delicacy of the errand he had undertaken came home to him. Impulse had brought him thus far, but now he stood staring helplessly at a row of bells, speaking tubes, and cards. Which, for example, belonged to the lady whose soprano voice pervaded the neighbourhood? He looked up and down the street, in the vain hope of finding a messenger. The song continued: he had promised to stop it. Hodder accused himself of cowardice. To his horror, Hodder felt stealing over him, incredible though it seemed after the depths through which he had passed, a faint sense of fascination in the adventure. It was this that appalled him--this tenacity of the flesh,--which no terrors seemed adequate to drive out. The sensation, faint as it was, unmanned him. There were still many unexplored corners in his soul. He turned, once more contemplated the bells, and it was not until then he noticed that the door was ajar. He pushed it open, climbed the staircase, and stood in the doorway of what might be called a sitting room, his eyes fixed on a swaying back before an upright piano against the wall; his heart seemed to throb with the boisterous beat of the music. The woman's hair, in two long and heavy plaits falling below her waist, suddenly fascinated him. It was of the rarest of russet reds. She came abruptly to the end of the song. "I beg your pardon--" he began. She swung about with a start, her music dropping to the floor, and stared at him. Her tattered blue kimono fell away at her elbows, her full throat was bare, and a slipper she had kicked off lay on the floor beside her. He recoiled a little, breathing deeply. She stared at him. "My God, how you scared me!" she exclaimed. Evidently a second glance brought to her a realization of his clerical costume. "Say, how did you get in here?" "I beg your pardon," he said again, "but there is a very sick child in the house next door and I came to ask you if you would mind not playing any more to-night." She did not reply at once, and her expression he found unsolvable. Much of it might be traced to a life which had contracted the habit of taking nothing on trust, a life which betrayed itself in unmistakable traces about the eyes. And Hodder perceived that the face, if the stamp of this expression could have been removed, was not unpleasing, although indulgence and recklessness were beginning to remould it. "Quit stringin' me," she said. For a moment he was at a loss. He gathered that she did not believe him, and crossed to the open window. "If you will come here," he said, "I will show you the room where he lies. We hope to be able to take him to the hospital to-morrow." He paused a moment, and added: "He enjoyed your music very much when he was better." The comment proved a touchstone. "Say," she remarked, with a smile that revealed a set of surprisingly good teeth, "I can make the box talk when I get a-goin'. There's no stopping me this side of grand opera,--that's no fable. I'm not so bad for an enginoo, am I?" Thus directly appealed to, in common courtesy he assented. "No indeed," he said. "That's right," she declared. "But the managers won't have it at any price. Those jays don't know anything, do they? They've only got a dream of what the public wants. You wouldn't believe it, but I've sung for 'em, and they threw me out. You wouldn't believe it, would you?" "I must own," said the rector, "that I have never had any experience with managers." She sat still considering him from the piano stool, her knees apart, her hands folded in her lap. Mockery came into her eyes. "Say, what did you come in here for, honest injun?" she demanded. He was aware of trying to speak sternly, and of failing. To save his life he could not, then, bring up before himself the scene in the little back room across the yard in its full terror and reality, reproduce his own feelings of only a few minutes ago which had impelled him hither. A month, a year might have elapsed. Every faculty was now centred on the woman in front of him, and on her life. "Why do you doubt me?" he asked. She continued to contemplate him. Her eyes were strange, baffling, smouldering, yellow-brown, shifting, yet not shifty: eyes with a history. Her laugh proclaimed both effrontery and uneasiness. "Don't get huffy," she said. "The kid's sick--that's on the level, is it? You didn't come 'round to see me?" The insinuation was in her voice as well as in her words. He did not resent it, but felt an odd thrill of commingled pity and--fear. "I came for the reason I have given you," he replied; and added, more gently: "I know it is a good deal to ask, but you will be doing a great kindness. The mother is distracted. The child, as I told you, will be taken to the hospital in the morning." She reached out a hand and closed the piano softly. "I guess I can hold off for to-night," she said. "Sometimes things get kind of dull--you know, when there's nothing doing, and this keeps me lively. How old is the kid?" "About nine," he estimated. "Say, I'm sorry." She spoke with a genuineness of feeling that surprised him. He went slowly, almost apologetically toward the door. "Good night," he said, "and thank you." Her look halted him. "What's your hurry?" she demanded. "I'm sorry," he said hastily, "but I must be going." He was, in truth, in a panic to leave. "You're a minister, ain't you?" "Yes," he said. "I guess you don't think much of me, do you?" she demanded. He halted abruptly, struck by the challenge, and he saw that this woman had spoken not for herself, but for an entire outlawed and desperate class. The fact that the words were mocking and brazen made no difference; it would have been odd had they not been so. With a shock of surprise he suddenly remembered that his inability to reach this class had been one of the causes of his despair! And now? With the realization, reaction set in, an overpowering feeling of weariness, a desire--for rest--for sleep. The electric light beside the piano danced before his eyes, yet he heard within him a voice crying out to him to stay. Desperately tired though he was, he must not leave now. He walked slowly to the table, put his hat on it and sat down in a chair beside it. "Why do you say that?" he asked. "Oh, cut it out!" said the woman. "I'm on to you church folks." She laughed. "One of 'em came in here once, and wanted to pray. I made a monkey of him." "I hope," said the rector, smiling a little, "that is not the reason why you wish me to stay." She regarded him doubtfully. "You're not the same sort," she announced at length. "What sort was he?" "He was easy,--old enough to know better--most of the easy ones are. He marched in sanctimonious as you please, with his mouth full of salvation and Bible verses." She laughed again at the recollection. "And after that," said the rector, "you felt that ministers were a lot of hypocrites." "I never had much opinion of 'em," she admitted, "nor of church people, either," she added, with emphasis. "There's Ferguson, who has the department store,--he's 'way up' in church circles. I saw him a couple of months ago, one Sunday morning, driving to that church on Burton Street, where all the rich folks go. I forget the name--" "St. John's," he supplied. He had got beyond surprise. "St. John's--that's it. They tell me he gives a lot of money to it--money that he steals from the girls he hires. Oh, yes, he'll get to heaven--I don't think." "How do you mean that he steals money from the girls?" "Say, you are innocent--ain't you! Did you ever go down to that store? Do you know what a floorwalker is? Did you ever see the cheap guys hanging around, and the young swells waiting to get a chance at the girls behind the counters? Why do you suppose so many of 'em take to the easy life? I'll put you next--because Ferguson don't pay 'em enough to live on. That's why. He makes 'em sign a paper, when he hires 'em, that they live at home, that they've got some place to eat and sleep, and they sign it all right. That's to square up Ferguson's conscience. But say, if you think a girl can support herself in this city and dress on what he pays, you've got another guess comin'." There rose up before him, unsummoned, the image of Nan Ferguson, in all her freshness and innocence, as she had stood beside him on the porch in Park Street. He was somewhat astonished to find himself defending his parishioner. "May it not be true, in order to compete with other department stores, that Mr. Ferguson has to pay the same wages?" he said. "Forget it. I guess you know what Galt House is? That's where women like me can go when we get all played out and there's nothing left in the game--it's on River Street. Maybe you've been there." Hodder nodded. "Well," she continued, "Ferguson pays a lot of money to keep that going, and gets his name in the papers. He hands over to the hospitals where some of us die--and it's all advertised. He forks out to the church. Now, I put it to you, why don't he sink some of that money where it belongs--in living wages? Because there's nothing in it for him--that's why." The rector looked at her in silence. He had not suspected her of so much intellect. He glanced about the apartment, at the cheap portiere flung over the sofa; at the gaudy sofa cushions, two of which bore the names and colours of certain colleges. The gas log was almost hidden by dried palm leaves, a cigarette stump lay on the fender; on the mantel above were several photographs of men and at the other side an open door revealed a bedroom. "This is a nice place, ain't it?" she observed. "I furnished it when I was on velvet--nothing was too good for me. Money's like champagne when you take the cork out, it won't keep. I was rich once. It was lively while it lasted," she added, with a sigh: "I've struck the down trail. I oughtn't, by rights, to be here fooling with you. There's nothing in it." She glanced at the clock. "I ought to get busy." As the realization of her meaning came to him, he quivered. "Is there no way but that?" he asked, in a low voice. "Say, you're not a-goin' to preach, are you?" "No," he answered, "God forbid! I was not asking the question of you." She stared at him. "Of who, then?" He was silent. "You've left me at the station. But on the level, you don't seem to know much, that's a fact. You don't think the man who owns these flats is in it for charity, do you? 'Single ladies,' like me, have to give up. And then there are other little grafts that wouldn't interest you. What church do you come from anyway?" "You mentioned it a little while ago." "St. John's!" She leaned back against the piano and laughed unrestrainedly. "That's a good one, to think how straight I've been talking to you." "I'm much obliged to you," he said. Again she gazed at him, now plainly perplexed. "What are you giving me?" "I mean what I say," he answered. "I am obliged to you for telling me things I didn't know. And I appreciate--your asking me to stay." She was sitting upright now, her expression changed, her breath came more rapidly, her lips parted as she gazed at him. "Do you know," she said, "I haven't had anybody speak to me like that for four years." Her voice betrayed excitement, and differed in tone, and she had cast off unconsciously the vulgarity of speech. At that moment she seemed reminiscent of what she must once have been; and he found himself going through an effort at reconstruction. "Like what?" he asked. "Like a woman," she answered vehemently. "My name is John Hodder," he said, "and I live in the parish house, next door to the church. I should like to be your friend, if you will let me. If I can be of any help to you now, or at any other time, I shall feel happy. I promise not to preach," he added. She got up abruptly, and went to the window. And when she turned to him again, it was with something of the old bravado. "You'd better leave me alone, I'm no good;" she said. "I'm much obliged to you, but I don't want any charity or probation houses in mine. And honest work's a thing of the past for me--even if I could get a job. Nobody would have me. But if they would, I couldn't work any more. I've got out of the hang of it." With a swift and decisive movement she crossed the room, opened a cabinet on the wall, revealing a bottle and glasses. "So you're bent upon going--downhill?" he said. "What can you do to stop it?" she retorted defiantly, "Give me religion---I guess you'd tell me. Religion's all right for those on top, but say, it would be a joke if I got it. There ain't any danger. But if I did, it wouldn't pay room-rent and board." He sat mute. Once more the truth overwhelmed, the folly of his former optimism arose to mock him. What he beheld now, in its true aspect, was a disease of that civilization he had championed... She took the bottle from the cupboard and laid it on the table. "What's the difference?" she demanded. "It's all over in a little while, anyway. I guess you'd tell me there was a hell. But if that's so, some of your church folks'll broil, too. I'll take my chance on it, if they will." She looked at him, half in defiance, half in friendliness, across the table. "Say, you mean all right, but you're only wastin' time here. You can't do me any good, I tell you, and I've got to get busy." "May we not at least remain friends?" he asked, after a moment. Her laugh was a little harsh. "What kind of friendship would that be? You, a minister, and me a woman on the town?" "If I can stand it, I should think you might." "Well, I can't stand it," she answered. He got up, and held out his hand. She stood seemingly irresolute, and then took it. "Good night," he said. "Good night," she repeated nonchalantly. As he went out of the door she called after him: "Don't be afraid I'll worry the kid!" The stale odour of cigarette smoke with which the dim corridor was charged intoxicated, threatened to overpower him. It seemed to be the reek of evil itself. A closing door had a sinister meaning. He hurried; obscurity reigned below, the light in the lower hall being out; fumbled for the door-knob, and once in the street took a deep breath and mopped his brow; but he had not proceeded half a block before he hesitated, retraced his steps, reentered the vestibule, and stooped to peer at the cards under the speaking tubes. Cheaply printed in large script, was the name of the tenant of the second floor rear,--MISS KATE MARCY.... In crossing Tower Street he was frightened by the sharp clanging of a great electric car that roared past him, aflame with light. His brain had seemingly ceased to work, and he stumbled at the curb, for he was very tired. The events of the day no longer differentiated themselves in his mind but lay, a composite weight, upon his heart. At length he reached the silent parish house, climbed the stairs and searched in his pocket for the key of his rooms. The lock yielded, but while feeling for the switch he tripped and almost fell over an obstruction on the floor. The flooding light revealed his travelling-bags, as he had piled them, packed and ready to go to the station. _ |